Open Letter to Bad Drivers

I’ve experienced two incidents on Alabama roads since this summer, including this very morning, that make me find the need to write an open letter.  Particularly, an open letter to shitty drivers.  I’m not saying Michigan is devoid of bad drivers or that all Alabama drivers are bad; I’m just sick of dealing with people who can’t freaking drive properly.  So here are some helpful rules for drivers who need to go back to driving school.

Rule #1: Use Your Fucking Turn Signal

I don’t know why people have such a hard time with this.  The whole point of the turn signal is to let people know what you intend to do on the road.  So use your signal if you intend to change lanes.  Or intend to merge.  Or intend to turn.  If other drivers don’t know what you’re doing (which btw people aren’t psychics, crazy right?) that’s when bad things happen.  The whole point of the turn signal is for everyone to be aware of what people are doing on the road.

Rule #2: Put Your Phone Down

Let me put it this way: is telling someone “hey” as important as your life? No.  End of freaking discussion.  You don’t need to be texting, or even talking on the phone if it is going to be a major distraction to your driving.  Texting, we obviously know is a major enough distraction because you’ve got one hand (at least) not on the wheel and unless you can text perfectly without looking (doubtful) then your eyes are also not on the road.  It’s not worth it.  No text message is worth your life unless you’re the president, in which case you don’t drive your own car.

Rule #3: Life Is About Taking the Scenic Route

I know how important it can be to get somewhere.  But taking drastic measures because you might miss your exit is not an excuse for your behavior.  Particularly in the case of this morning, in which the driver could easily have gotten off and the next exit and made three turns to get back on the desired road.  I hate getting lost, but since GPS isn’t always accurate and I don’t know all the roads in this city (I’m not Sherlock, damn) it is inevitable.  If you have to take the long route, it isn’t as bad as putting someone else’s life in danger.

Rule #4: If Tired, Pull Over

One of the worst car accidents I’ve ever been in was because someone fell asleep at the wheel.  I understand being tired and the desire to just get home, because I’ve been in situations where I had cold air blowing on my face and music turned to high heaven for me to stay alert.  But if you really feel you can’t keep your eyes open or find yourself having long slow blinks, pull over your car.  Call a taxi or friend to come and get you.  It’s a sucky situation especially when you’re exhausted and just want to be home, but it is safer to rely on someone else than to put your life and the lives of all other drivers at risk.

Rule #5: Don’t Drive Drunk/Tipsy

This is obvious.  But at the same time, not entirely obvious.  You know when you’re drunk.  And you know not to drive when you’re drunk.  Most people abide by this, though some don’t.  But what less people abide, and even I’m guilty of this, driving while tipsy.  I’ve only ever done this twice.  But I felt terrible about it.  I really shouldn’t have been driving; I would have at least been very close to the limit and maybe over.  The problem is that I don’t always feel tipsy when I go to leave, but realize it after the fact.  So again, pull over and call a taxi or a friend to come get you.  It just isn’t worth the risk.

So you may (or may not) be wondering what actually happened this morning on the road.  For anyone who knows the area of the Bham, you’ll probably know which section of road I’m distinctly talking about.  Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday morning, I get up early (asscrack of dawn) and have to drive a specific way to work.  I get on 65 North, and eventually merge onto 459 South (though it runs more southwest).  Once on 459, I pass the exit for 31 and immediately after take the off ramp for the mall.  Now, the exit for 31 and the sign and exit for the mall are not that far apart.  Well I was in the right lane getting ready to get off at my exit and a car in the lane to the left of me, swerved in front of me to make the exit for 31.  There were two lanes to my right, designated for the exit at 31.  So at least three lanes covered by the swerving.  He’s lucky I have good brakes, because he was less than one car length in front of me.  I’m also lucky no one was behind me.  This idiot didn’t have his/her signal on at all, but just jerked over to make the exit.  Anyone from the area knows that all he/she needed to do was take the next exit and drive around the mall to get back to 31.  But instead, the idiot driver swerved, putting my life and his/her life at risk.  I don’t know if the driver was drunk (it was just after 4 am on a Sunday) or just stupid, but I’m sick of my life being put in compromising positions by other drivers.  People need to stop being such selfish drivers and consider the other people on the road.

I’ve said my piece, so now I’m going to try and relax and enjoy something today since I’m still on edge.  Please be considerate of other people on the road, and learn to focus on your driving habits, not your textual communication.  I know I will appreciate it.

Book Club: October

Book club for October is not only coming late this time, it’s untraditional.  Recently, due to financial pressures, I’ve had to get a second job.  So before, when I had three days off, I had more time to read and time to go to book club on Thursdays.  Well that went out the window. Bye time I used to have!

That being said, I decided to improvise so that I could still do book club blogs, but instead of it being books chosen and talked about in book club, I will pick books I’ve read in that month to discuss.  I didn’t read many books in October, so my choices were limited, but I read a great book that I’d like to talk about here.

Image from MatterDeep Publishing

The book is called Olympia Heights by Amy Strickland.  She’s a local author here in Birmingham and I came across the book from my friend Cathie who works with Amy’s husband, who recommended the series to her.  My friend Cathie really liked it, so she passed it along to me.

A Young Adult fiction, the story is set in a high school just outside of Miami, Florida.  Football captain Zach is a leader, popular, and has a way with ladies, much to the distress of his girlfriend June.  During a football game, Zach experiences what he believes is being struck by lightning, when really he produced the lightning.  What then transpires is normal kids in high school discovering that they aren’t normal and they aren’t really kids: they’re ancient gods.

Many people who have read the series compare it to the similarly written Percy Jackson novels.  I enjoyed coming into the reading having not yet read Percy Jackson.  My friend Cathie said at times she had difficulty differentiating the stories because they are so similar.  Not having that problem was refreshing for me because I got to enjoy the story without constant comparison or confusion.  Another great part is that the characters names have a common letter with the god or goddess they represent.  Zach=Zeus, June=Juno, etc.

There were only two downsides for me.  At times the storyline didn’t seem present.  Events would move along, but it lacked cohesion at parts that made the story difficult to follow.  Also, there is such a multitude of characters, representing gods, that it can get incredibly confusing remembering who is whom.  Some of them are more obvious based on their talent and how frequently it is used.  But the lesser known gods get forgotten at times and I had trouble remembering which god or goddess they were and their power, and their history with the other gods and goddesses.

I don’t have any quotes for this book since it was loaned to me and I don’t usually mark other people’s books.  Overall, I found it a very amusing read and got to enjoy the story as separate from Percy Jackson.  At times it was hard to follow, but still a great and fast read.  I’m currently reading the second book of the series, so that might end up being my November book club. We’ll see.

For more by Amy Strickland, visit her website here and access her blog here!

Hufflepuff Is Actually Awesome, Here's Why

I take to the vlog-o-sphere to celebrate the arrival of fall and defend my Hogwarts house Hufflepuff. It's a love of Harry Potter and being all Huffly!

For the honey badger video, go here.

Happy Dance and Stuff

So here's my second go at a vlog post! It's shorter, and cut together a little better. There's a lot of jokes about Brotherhood 2.0 and the Vlogbrothers so if you don't understand, I'm sorry. Check them out on youtube. They are hilarious. Anyway, in this video you get to see my happy dance, hear me add "in my pants" jokes to book titles, and listen to me rant about cell phone etiquette. Enjoy!

Vlog Post!

I finally took a leap forward and made a video post! I'm hoping I stick with it and obviously looking for ideas for posts!

The basis of the video was a survey done by Hank and John Green on their Vlogbrothers page in the first year of Brotherhood 2.0.  Below the video is the questions, so feel free to answer in response! Enjoy me talking for eleven minutes!

Questions                       

1. Your name?

2. Your Web page?

3 What have you been up to this past year (please be as detailed as possible, because we actually want to know)?

4 How much longer do you think you’ll be doing what you’re doing?

5 Why are you doing it?

6 What do you want to be doing?

7 What’s next in your life?

8 How You Doin’?

9 What’s the best book you read this year?

10 Describe a perfect day?

11 Assuming that all things come to an end…how do you think humans will go extinct?

12 How are you feeling about kids these days?

13 (- In this space, compose your own question, and answer it -)

14 Ambrozzo tastes better than anything else, what does ambrozzo taste like?

15 If you were a cliché, what cliché would you be?

16 What is your least favorite part of any given day?

17 Do you enjoy science fiction?

18 Cheese or Chocolate?

19 Where would you live if you could live anywhere?

20 What was your first concert?

21 If you could start a business that would be instantly successful, what kind of business would it be?

22 Invisibility or Time Travel?

23 What’s wrong with the world?

                   

 If you found this survey amusing, I highly recommend checking out Vlogbrothers. They're smart and funny. Go Nerdfighters!

Book Club: September

This month’s book is Remarkable Creatures by Tracy Chevalier, the same author who penned Girl With a Pearl Earring.  Chevalier’s niche in writing is to take historical people, places, and things and create fictional stories centered around it.  Girl With a Pearl Earring is based on the painting by Vermeer.  Some of the characters in this story are real, but the bulk of the story is fictionalized experiences.

Image from Goodreads

Remarkable Creatures follows the story of Mary Anning, a young girl in England with a talent for spotting fossils.  She finds a “crocodile” in the cliffs by her home, or everyone assumes it is a crocodile.  What she found was actually an ancient creature unknown to man.  As the story unfolds, Mary is swept up into science world and though she is the first person to have contact with the beast in the rocks, she gets no credit.  She’s a woman in a man’s world.  Her story is told jointly with that of Elizabeth Philpot, an aging spinster destined to live out her unmarried life in Lyme.  Elizabeth’s interest in fossils does not extend to the beasts but fish instead, and as she grows accustomed to life by the sea she finds friendship with Mary.

Two big picture issues arise in the novel: women in science and the battle between creationism and evolution.  Because of the time period, Edwardian England, women still had very little rights compared to men.  Even though Mary is the one who finds the fossils and unleashes a ground breaking change for science, she gets no credit.  The men around her to whom she sells fossils take the credit as their own.  Eventually, given time and societal chance, credit was given where it was due.  But it took years for women to not only involved in the academic field, but given credit as well.  The second issue is how to approach these creatures that no one has ever seen before.  How do you explain this thing?  Did God, who loves all his creations, make the animal and then abandon it?  Was it a first test at creating a creature we know today?  The book doesn’t completely delve into this philosophical battle because that isn’t the point of the story.  The point of the story is Mary Anning.  This debate is lightly skirted around as something for the reader to consider, but at that time, the finding of these prehistoric creatures would have been a head turner for the religious community.

Here are the quotes I found interesting:

“Yes, Mary Anning, you are different from all the rocks on the beach.” (pg. 4)

“It was seen as an unladylike pursuit, dirty and mysterious.  I didn’t mind.  There was no one I wanted to impress with my feminity.” (pg.19)  Haha, me on an everyday basis :)

“‘Do not ask me difficult questions,’ he might as well have said.” (pg. 93)  This is when Elizabeth is challenging her reverend about the fossil

“Mary Anning is female.  She is a spare part.” (pg. 105)  the mentality of the time

“She was flirting with him.  Of course he loved telling her what he know.  Men do.” (pg. 159)

“Both may have genuinely meant to help, but by then they all seemed sinister.  I have never hated being a lady and yet at the same time hated men as much as I did during those minutes alone on the London Streets.” (pg. 199)  Elizabeth’s perspective when she is out and about by herself.  This is unbelievably relevant to how I feel about going out to bars and dealing with strange men

Not my favorite book so far this year, but still an interesting read.  The title Remarkable Creatures applies not only to the beasts they find in the rocks, but also the women that find them.  More information on the novel can be found here at Tracy Chevalier's website.

Your Eyes Are Blurry, Thicke; These Lines Are Clear

People have been up in arms recently about a song released from Robin Thicke called “Blurred Lines.”  And I am one of them.  The song and the video both have elements that cross sexual boundaries.  What is the extra terrible cherry on the sundae of awful is that plenty of songs cross boundaries such as these and have for years, but no one seems to protest them.  The reason this song has been protested is mainly the video, but the lyrics are poor too.  Add them together for a cocktail of douche-baggery.

The video, which I have had occasion to watch, features Thicke, Pharrell, and T.I. singing while women prance around them completely naked with the exception of nude underwear.  So here’s my question, apart from the already questionable lyrics, what is the damn point?  Women prancing around naked?  Just because they want to have them.  The music video, still available on youtube, is inflammatory on its own.  In addition to the lyrics, it’s down right disgusting.  Below is the clean version, but the unrated version can still be viewed on Youtube if you verify your age.

Blurred Lines Lyrics

[Verse 1: Robin Thicke]

If you can't hear what I'm trying to say

If you can't read from the same page

Maybe I'm going deaf,

Maybe I'm going blind

Maybe I'm out of my mind

[Pharell:] Everybody get up

[Pre-chorus: Robin Thicke]

OK now he was close, tried to domesticate you

But you're an animal, baby, it's in your nature

Just let me liberate you. Hey, hey, hey

You don't need no papers. Hey, hey, hey

That man is not your maker

[Chorus: Robin Thicke]

And that's why I'm gon' take a good girl

I know you want it, I know you want it, I know you want it

You're a good girl

Can't let it get past me

You're far from plastic

Talk about getting blasted

I hate these blurred lines

I know you want it, I know you want it, I know you want it

But you're a good girl

The way you grab me

Must wanna get nasty

Go ahead, get at me

[Pharell:] Everybody get up

[Verse 2: Robin Thicke]

What do they make dreams for

When you got them jeans on

What do we need steam for

You the hottest bitch in this place

I feel so lucky

Hey, hey, hey

You wanna hug me

Hey, hey, hey

What rhymes with hug me?

Hey, hey, hey

[Pre-chorus and Chorus]

[Verse 3: T.I.]

One thing I ask of you

Let me be the one you back that ass to

Go, from Malibu, to Paris, boo

Yeah, I had a bitch, but she ain't bad as you

So hit me up when you passing through

I'll give you something big enough to tear your ass in two

Swag on, even when you dress casual

I mean it's almost unbearable

In a hundred years not dare, would I

Pull a Pharside let you pass me by

Nothing like your last guy, he too square for you

He don't smack that ass and pull your hair like that

So I just watch and wait for you to salute

But you didn't pick

Not many women can refuse this pimpin'

I'm a nice guy, but don't get it if you get with me

[Bridge: Robin Thicke]

Shake the vibe, get down, get up

Do it like it hurt, like it hurt

What you don't like work?

[Pre-chorus: Robin Thicke]

Baby can you breathe? I got this from Jamaica

It always works for me, Dakota to Decatur, uh huh

No more pretending

Hey, hey, hey

Cause now you winning

Hey, hey, hey

Here's our beginning

[Chorus: Robin Thicke]

So there are a few specific lines that stick out to me as incredibly offensive.  The first is pre-chorus in which Robin likens the girl’s last relationship as him trying to domesticate her and Robin being the one who can liberate her.  On the one hand, he is claiming that the last guy wasn’t her maker and couldn’t domesticate her, but on the other hand he’s saying he is the one who can liberate her….with his penis, I’m presuming.  Bro, I’m already liberated and I didn’t need your dick to do so.

Secondly, the repeated usage of “I know you want it” especially after saying “I hate these blurred lines.”  One of the most common rape myths or excuses used by rapists is that the victim actually wanted it.  Even though she was saying no, she really meant yes.  No means no.  “The way you grab me, must wanna get nasty.”  Because apparently women aren’t allowed to do anything sexual because it means they want sex?  No. That is like saying a woman kissing you wants to have sex with you just because she’s kissing you.  Shockingly enough, a physical relationship can happen without sex.  So which are these blurred lines exactly?  The sexual blurred lines?  Those lines aren’t blurred.  Those lines are actually very explicit.  That’s why there are laws about those lines.

The last part that really got me was T.I.’s solo in which he talks about this “bitch” he used to know, and that he can “tear your ass in two,” and “he don’t smack that ass and pull your hair like that.”  Calling a woman a bitch is not endearing.  It is most certainly not going to make me want to sleep with you, but hey, these lines are blurred so you’ll probably just take it anyway right?  The use of sexual preferences here is used in a degrading manner.  Anal sex, spanking, or hair pulling are personal preferences, but when a singer tells me he can tear my ass in two, and how he’ll smack my ass and pull my hair, it isn’t a come on, it’s predatorily sexual.

Creepy lyrics + naked girls = sketchy as hell song

Robin Thicke even tried to defend his song, saying the lyrics were misinterpreted and how it is supposed to be a feminist movement.  Which is why the women were naked in the video, right Robin?  All three artists that contributed to the song are married with kids, do any of them have daughters?  Did any of them think for one second how one of their kids would view this?  More can be read about Robin’s perception of the misinterpretation at Huff Post, along with pictures from the music video.  Whatever you want to claim, Robin, your song is not a feminist movement.

I mentioned at the very beginning of the post that many people have been up in arms about the song lyrics and video.  One group in Auckland, New Zealand made a reply video called “Defined Lines.” Read more here at Huff Post.

Defined Lines Lyrics

Every bigot shut up (x 2)

Hey hey hey (x 3)

Boy you'd better quit all your sexist ways

So hear our manifesto of the modern age.

It's time to undermine

The masculine confines

Coz we don't wanna grind,

Gri-ii-iind.

You think that you're so slick,

Let me emasculate ya!

Because your precious dick

Can't beat my vibrator.

We're feelin' the frustration

From all the exploitation.

Prepare for your castration.

(Chorus)

So we can fuck this man's world,

With all its bullshit,

Girls don't deserve it.

We ain't good girls:

We are scholastic,

Smart and sarcastic,

Not fucking plastic.

Listen mankind!

If you wanna get nasty,

Just don't harass me:

You can't just grab me.

That's a sex crime!

Yeah we don't want it -

It's chauvinistic.

You're such a bigot!

What you see on tv

Doesn't speak equality,

It's straight up misogyny.

Don't want you to come on my face!

You think you're hunky (hey hey hey)

You wanna hug me (hey hey hey)

Don't you mean fuck me?

One thing I ask of you:

Don't assume that we all just wanna screw.

Gotta respect me for me to be your boo.

We don't want no scrubs, no we don't approve.

Need a universal role reversal,

In real life not a dress rehearsal.

Gotta resist all the gender roles,

Time to put misogyny on parole,

Put exploitation on probation,

Time for you to witness our liberation!

There's more to life than penetration,

And sexual discrimination.

So tonight we ignite our civil rights,

Resist chauvinism,

Win the fight,

Coz you're livin large just like a montage

Of you and your friends actin' out Entourage.

But we ain't whores to do your household chores,

To make you a sandwich when we're on all fours.

From history to herstory.

Know you got some opinions that we don't agree.

Need to call my sister Joan of A-R-C,

Bake a feminist cake, Antoinette Marie.

Yeah, guys, we got spies,

Know all you wanna do is fertilise,

But avert your eyes from my thighs,

Never tell a bitch that she gotta drop a size.

You wanna box gap? Show me your six pack.

Wanna landing strip? You'd better get ripped.

I apologise if you think my lines are crass,

Tell me how it feels to get verbally harassed.

(Chorus)

This video is getting a lot of controversy and criticism as well.  Here’s my take.  As a feminist, I believe in equality between the sexes.  Does this video represent that idea?  No.  Because if that were the case, they wouldn’t need men being scantily clad.  That being said, I think this video is still spot on about how women are represented.  

Men are not and have never been treated the same in media or life as women.  Catcalling seems innocent enough to men.  But as a woman, I can’t stand it.  I used to think it was flattering because I had low self esteem and thought a guy paying me any attention at all was nice.  But now, I think it’s degrading and humiliating.  You aren’t paying me a compliment to who I am, you’re paying me a compliment to what you see.  Men have likely never felt wary of meeting the opposite sex at bars.  Do I think all men are evil and prey on women?  Absolutely not.  But do I have enough evidence at my disposal to be wary of men I meet?  Absolutely yes.  Men have always been considered the stronger sex, because they are the ones who have always dictated how things go.  I don’t believe that personally, but I’m short and know by physical averages most men are taller than me.  I could probably fight a guy off long enough to get away, but I also don’t want to be put into that situation.

I’m not saying “Blurred Lines” is an evil song.  I’m not saying you should boycott it.  I’m not saying “Defined Lines” is perfect.

What I am saying is that women are not treated the same way in the world as men, and that before people blindly listen to music, think about what it is saying and if this is a song you’d want to hear your children singing along to some day.