Monday, June 16, 2014

Clique, Clique, Boom

I've spent a lot of time in my growing up adjusting to the fact that I'm an introvert.  I used to be ashamed of it and tried to force myself into being more extroverted.  Not only did it make me incredibly uncomfortable at times, it also felt like a complete waste of my time.  I'm not ever going to be the person that chooses clubbing over Netflix.  Getting dressed up and hitting the town over yoga pants and a new book.  That will not ever be me.  And it took time, but I can say honestly, that I am okay with that.  Being an introverted person is who I am, and it is good.  More on that topic in my birthday blog post

Now, the downside to this is that I often am surrounded by extroverted people.  They want to have gatherings and get together and go out and do things.  Not entirely problematic for me.  I can at times choose to push myself and have a good time.  But my work schedule being the tough one that it is (seriously, don't ever work security, it sucks), I most often am unable to do things at normal times. See this lovely Buzzfeed article that nicely describes the challenges of working at weird hours.  Anyway, having to work at 4:30 in the morning or 6:30 in the morning or until midnight on the weekends every weekend...well it puts a damper on anyone's social calendar.  The exclusion from even being invited to social activities has now happened to me twice as a scenario.  More than twice counting specific events.  Doesn't suck any less the next time around than it did the previous time, people.

And here's the thing: I know I'm introverted and I may not be able to make plans because of work, but that doesn't mean I don't still want to be considered to hang out.  Finding out via another person or random text that plans have been made that I haven't even been asked to join, it hurts.  Most times, yes work probably would have prohibited me from going.  IT HAPPENS.  But deciding just because of my schedule or introverted personality not to even attempt to invite me clearly means you don't value me.  Because if you did, you'd ask anyway.  If you valued me, you'd let me know "Hey, we're having a thing but I'm pretty sure you can't make it because of work." or "We're planning a dinner, I know your schedule is crazy but is there any chance you can come?"  There are options instead of just casting me aside.  And if you ask me, and I value you, no matter what my work or personal preference, I'll make an effort to be there.  Because I care.

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